Thursday, March 4, 2010

Give illness the finger

Ever had the following conversation?

"I feel crook"

"What's wrong with you, where does it hurt?"

"I don't know, I just can't put my finger on it"

Well we've come up with the answer to just that problem. Just as the Homeopathic preparation Oscillococcinum is diluted, fermented duck liver and heart tissue, None Labs has developed Digitum.

What's Digitum?

To make one squillion gallons of Digitum-

  • first take two human fingers, one from a left hand and one from a right (to maintain digital equilibrium of course- silly question) then add 1 litre of water and allow to ferment from one blue moon to the next.

  • Strain off the decayed bits then dilute the vile liquid and decant repeatedly 500 times and hey presto- Digitum 500T is the result.

  • Apply liberally whenever that 'just can't put a finger on it' feeling overcomes you.

To be marketed under the catchy slogan 'Digitum is real Handy when you just can't put a Finger on what's wrong', we are confident that it will quickly attain a reputation at least equal to Oscillococcinum for reliability and effectiveness.

Prof. Cox comments that we are definitely pointing in the right direction and gives it the big thumbs up.

1 comment:

Cheryl said...

I was very skeptical about placebo remedies up until now but Digitum has convinced me that there really could be something in it. Can't wait to get my hands on a bottle.
I often get that 'can't put my finger on it' feeling so I think I'll be a regular patient.